28 Apr 2013

Too Much & The Week's End

Can we have an honesty session on this Sunday?  Sunday is a good day for honesty, right?

Lately, I've been feeling like it's all too much.  I am getting bogged down by this world obsessed with perfect-ness. I get sucked in and start feeling like what I am doing isn't good enough, pretty enough, fast enough, smart enough...you get the idea.  I know I am not the only one that feels this way.

I was catching up on some blog reading this week and read so many recaps about blogging conferences that my head started to spin.  I know people mean well by sharing their tips so that those of us who can't attend can benefit from what they leaned, but after I read about the 4th recap it all became too much.  You have to be on Google +, you have to engage, you have to Pin between the hours of  7am-11am, you HAVE to be on Instagram (after all where the heck are you if you aren't on Instagram?), you have to edit each photo, you have to post at least 3 times a week....and let's not forget that you have to be original, creative and yourself.  WAHHHH?

How? How am I supposed to do all of that without feeling like a total and complete gigantic failing loser who isn't good at much of anything.  I can't.  I simply can't.  I know that so many of these tips are for people who want to grow their blog and who do this gig for a living.  I don't do this for a living.  I work at my day job for 31 hours a week, and I take care of Fin (my most important project), and I hang out with my hubby, and in the in-between times I start too many projects.  I love blogging, but it can't win over my family and other things that I also love.

I know it.  I know I put it on myself.  I know I am my hardest critic.  I know I can't do it all.  All these things I know, but it's still hard.  It all just catches up.  

I have decided that I am going to take control of it.  I am going to say no.  I am going to do what I want.  (If you know me in real life you know that I don't say no very well...so this is me attempting to be strong...).

I am on Facebook and I am on Twitter (sort of....), and for now that's going to be it for me.  I can't handle any more social media.  I am not going to start with Google + (as much as Google is trying to force me), and I am not going to publicize my Instagram feed.  Does that make me a bad blogger?  Maybe.  But I have to have faith that if you want to chat with me and connect you know how.  Right?  (hint: email, Facebook, comment....). 

Here's the other thing.....

I am starting to really get into photography.  Real photography, with my real camera.  I love it.  I am desperate to learn and to improve.  I like photographing rooms, but I like hanging out with my fam and my fur baby and taking pictures of them too (actually, they are more receptive subjects than rooms are...).  I spend time editing those pictures instead of writing blog posts....and I like it.  I know it's sort of taking on more, which is exactly what I said I wasn't going to do - but it's more that I am loving.  It's fun, not work.  It's like the best parts of blogging, except without all of the stuff I am 'supposed' to do that goes along with blogging.

So, I've decided to combine the best of both worlds.  I'm going to start a new series on Sundays called The Week's End.  It's going to be photos and only photos.  No text.  (Obviously this post and its giant rant is the one exception!).  Photos of us, photos of projects I am working on, photos of our week, you get the idea.  I know people love their Instragram, but I love real pictures that have been edited with purpose and thought (and in my case some serious time and usually a lot of Googling on how to adjust curves).   

I am excited about it.  My hope is that it spurs us into communicating in a new way. Let's chat through the comments or start a conversation about a photo up on Facebook.  Less text and more conversation.  

Don't worry, this doesn't mean my DIY stuff is going anywhere....it's still here, it's just supplemented with some other things I love.  I still have oodles of projects going on around the house and am going to share all of the nitty gritty.  

Does it sound ok?  Let's give it a shot.  

The Week's End - April 28, 2013












19 comments:

  1. i said a "no" to it all last year after attending a conference..... i realized through going that it was not me and not what i wanted. now i just blog because i like it and for me only... i like connecting so i blog to connect. but who cares if my blog grows, etc? and the people who are judging me as not being a "big enough" or good enough or just "enough" of a blogger in general, well, they don't need to read my blog and i am totally ok with that because it's not for them anyhow! :) you have to really LIVE and you have to really LOVE and sometimes you can't do that when you start to feel like there is no way you can do that plus everything you are expected to do. so just drop the expectations and enjoy your life.
    love the photos- especially that last one!

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  2. Morning Kelly,

    It's like you're reading my mind. I am experiencing or just finished experiencing the same thing you're going through. Like you, I work (teacher, not your normal hours because of the volunteering I do for several organizations), I've got my home blog, my classroom blog, my math blog (yup I'm a bit of a math geek), a NING I'm suppose to be involved with, home renovations and more home renovations, now that spring is arriving, we'll be working outside (Will it ever end???), my husband, no children, oh yay and some where in there some time for me. When I refer to time with me it's not writing blog posts.

    I haven't posted on any of my other two blogs since Feb. (Bad Ms. Brown). Just like you I'm beating myself up over it but you know what? The world will keep revolving and blogging will still happen. This isn't a full time job for me, maybe for others it might be and I can see attending conferences if it is. I usually skip over those posts because I know they are not going to make me feel good about myself. It's hard but you can do it.

    I often feel like I can't do it all (nor should we be able to) but I've learned something in this past 6 months of moving and renovating. It's okay to not get it all done. I know I just put that out there and let me tell you every weekend is a struggle to follow through with this. I guess what I'm saying is that you need to be true to you and your family only. Nobody else in this world matters than them and yourself. It's important to have balance but also to take care of yourself. If reading all of the blog posts make you not love your life or how you do things, step back for awhile. Like you I took up photography as a hobby, I'm loving it as well. I'm learning and maybe not very good but the pictures are for me. Like you I was enthralled with photography blogs but I have to delete them after awhile because they were not making me feel good about the pictures I was taking. I've stepped back from the blogs and look at them occasionally and get some ideas. It's okay to not be perfect. OMG! I just said that as well. He, He, He! Sometimes we don't know the real stories behind the blog posts, perhaps the bloggers are struggling with the very same issues as we are but are not as honest as you've been. Maybe they don't have what you've got and this is their hobby. The point is, we don't know and it's okay to not know but you need to be true to who you are and what is important to you.

    Enjoy taking pictures. Maybe this is the path you were meant to take at this point in your life. Who knows if you don't try it. The pictures look fabulous. I'm excited to see what you do with the fabric. It's beautiful. Hopefully I didn't take up all your comment space :-). Thanks for the post.

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  3. I was thinking of Cassie when I read your post.
    I totally agree with you about the conference recaps and photos. It kind of drove me insane and I felt like such a looser. On the other hand I'd love to go to one to meet people that I talk to every day.
    And I will not start paying a website to schedule pins for just the right time. That's just nuts.
    I love Instagram but I hate Twitter and just can't get myself to use it. And Google+ is just plain annoying.
    I want to surround myself with other bloggers who do this for fun and are supportive. I don't like when it gets competitive.
    And I can't stand when blogs are too monetized either.

    Love your photography. I would totally love to see more of it every week.

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  4. I prefer "real life" blogs over those that are trying to or have made it career. It's much easier to relate and so much less perfect. I always admire a girl who does exactly what she wants over a girl who does or is trying to do what everyone else is.

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    1. Thanks so much Robyn. It's hard to stick to your guns sometimes, isn't it? But I am trying...really trying. Have an awesome rest of your weekend. I'm off to enjoy the sun!

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  5. Ok, first of all I LOVE your photos - all of them!!! You've got a wonderful eye for photography and that's good you're going for it, you'll do well and I'm looking forward to your series. With regards to the other stuff, I know - I feel the exact same way sometimes. Don't let the pressure get to you, just do what you can and be YOU. Have a wonderful Sunday Kelly and thanks for keeping it real!

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  6. Hey I hear you! I work full time, take classes at night, and just decided to start a blog. It hasn't been easy, even though I enjoy it. I enjoy your blog, and hope you keep it up!

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    1. Thanks Justynn. I know exactly what you mean - it's one of those things that is really enjoyable but can sometimes be overwhelming and all consuming too. Just take it one day at a time! Thanks for the comment.

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  7. Kelly...I just want to reach through the computer and give you a big ole hug...and I don't even know if you're a huggy type of person, but I'd hug you regardless and make you super uncomfortable. ;) I have SO felt this way lately. Google +...ugh...I felt so pressured to do this and I went on there and saw all these circles and felt clueless! I promised myself that I wouldn't get on there again. I already feel exactly like you feel when I don't blog as often as others and I didn't need to go to google + to see what everyone else was doing. And don't even get me started with FB...I still use my personal page for my Scout & Nimble stuff...(I do want to create a S&N page, but I just haven't gotten to it, yet) and that's ok...shows where my priorities are, huh!? I don't tweet and I love IG, just because I love pictures. I need to find you on there! ;)
    I blog because it is an outlet for me...it may be once a week, it may be three times a week, but it is on my own schedule. I think you are pretty much a genius and I am so so happy that you said this out loud. I think there is a lot of pressure on bloggers all of the sudden...not only do you have to blog, but you have to do all these other things?!? It's really overwhelming and I feel exactly what you are saying.
    Let's just do what we do and be happy with that, deal? We are awesome women, wives and mommies...;)
    And your photography...amazing...that first pic definitely needs to be up on your wall...oh and Fin's belly is so sweet, too. High five, girlie...ditto to everything you said.

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    1. You know what's funny? The day I received the fabric from you I decided that I had to follow you on facebook (stalker, much?). So I went to S&N and tried to find the link...and didn't see one. And then I was bummed. But THEN I stopped and realized that you were the smart one who wasn't all over FB. It's funny how 2 people can see things differently. Here you are thinking that you need to be on it and I am the one thinking you are smart for not caving!
      As for Google +....I really thought I should be on it at one point, so I went and signed up, but it wouldn't let me make an account without using my last name. I tried every variation of my blog name that I could think of, but it kept telling me that it wasn't a valid name. So I stopped. Anything that is going to force me to use my real last name and put it out there into the universe isn't worth it in my opinion. It's a deal in our family that it stays private. But that's my beef, and I know other people love Google +.
      And yes, let's just be happy with who we are and know that whatever we do is great. I so love reading your comments, they are always so thoughtful and genuine. Thank you so, so much.

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    2. That is hilarious, Kelly! We are stalking each other because I tried to find you on IG and could not...too funny. Come find me (scoutandnimble) so I can see lots of pictures of your cutie patootie Fin and your awesome horse...I mean dog. ;) and you can see all the pictures I take of my boys...both furry and not furry. And then we can like each others pictures and feel super awesome...;)

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  8. i am glad to heave read this, for the past few weeks i have been wanting to delete facebook, i dont enjoy it much anymore. Blogging gives me the happiness i want right now in the online world
    Love your pictures as well.

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    1. Awe, thank you. I say do what you like. If you aren't liking FB then give it a break and just let people know that you need some time. I find that every time I beat myself up about something if I just tell my readers what's going on they are super understanding (and much like this post, there are usually others in the same boat). Best of luck to you in whichever way you decide to go!

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  9. I LOVE this idea!! Do you mind if I do this on my blog? I will most definitely credit you of course! I might do mine on Monday's too instead of Sunday... only if that's okay with you of course! =] Beautiful pictures by the way! I love the belly button shot! <33333

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    1. Thank you! You go for it! I'm flattered that you'd be interested in doing the same thing. Maybe we can start a trend....

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  10. Yay for just saying no!

    I'm so sick and tired of having to chase all of the 'hottest new thing' sites just to be considered active on the web. It's gotten utterly out of control. I can spend the entire day 'being social' and get absolutely nothing done on my own sites. Guess what happens, my site gets less traffic and makes less money. Golly, that worked. lol

    Love your photos. Have enjoyed visiting your site and hope you'll approve that I've added you to mine.

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    1. Thanks for the thoughts Michelle. I agree - there is always a new things around the corner, and it's impossible to keep up with how fast the internet is growing.

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  11. Oh wow - you are not alone, I saw another blogger recently posting feeling similarly. I think with the visual/planning/ideas that have been exploding out of the internet lately - you're going to hear about more and more folks having burnout issues because of it.

    It's just almost impossible to keep up with the "bigger, better, got to do this now trend". I'm with you when I say I'm not a fan of Google+, even though I was a beta tester. I just can't get excited over it. And I don't really get Twitter that much either. I have tweeted, but it's still not my thing. I'm not on Instagram either...

    You have already accomplished so much and are truly inspiring to me. I say - do what you want, when you want and do what makes YOU the happiest.

    This post came at a really pivotal time for me. I bought a ticket for the Haven conference as soon as they went on sale this year after experiencing regret over not trying to go last year. I still think it'll be a good experience, but I was feeling guilty up until then about whether I should or shouldn't go. Having accomplished little in the realm of self-publishing for myself - I wondered if I'd be going just to be with the DIY celebrities?

    My day job takes priority over any improvements I do at home, since I still have to get up and go to a 9-5 every week day. Lately, that has been what has been taking such a cache of my time. As I was saying to my coworker today: I can either do a really great job here, I can work on the oodles and oodles of projects I'd like to do and actually sit down and write about them too or I can take care of myself [been battling some autoimmune issues] - but I can't do all of them.

    So as a result - I am trying to take care of myself [and to this end, I need to devote more time, but it's a process] and I've been focusing on doing the very best I can at work.

    And as much as I love looking on Pinterest - this weekend I even said to my parents - wow, I feel like the most uncreative person on Earth when I see what other people have done, I would never have thought to do X,Y,Z.

    And that is so far from reality - but as the saying goes, "Comparison is the thief of joy". So I'm going to have to let that be a reminder to myself not to steal my own joy, or ever let myself steal the joy of others in return.

    Kudos to you for all of the hard work that you put into this page. I always enjoy reading it and will be happy to see wherever your journeys take you through this forum. Thanks for letting me tag along.

    P.s. - I love, love, love the photography! I think from this set, my favorite is the tunnel view of Diefenbaker. Love the perspective!

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    1. Thanks for such a thoughtful comment Erica! I think it's so true - we can't do everything....and in the end everyone needs to take care of themselves first. What good are we to anyone if we are burnt out and not ourselves any more? No project in the world is worth risking your health for - or your family relationships for that matter. There have been times that I have paid more attention to a project than the funny thing that Fin is doing, or instead of walking the dog and then later I realize that I am nuts. The fabric flowers won't talk back to me and reassure me when I've had a bad day - they don't depend on me or need me in any sort of way - so they are the ones that can wait. People have to to win...and by people I a mean real people ....the ones who see us face to face every day. But, as most things, it's easier to say than to do sometimes.
      Just as my 2 cents, I say go to Haven. I'm sure you'll learn a lot and then you can decide what you want to do with that knowledge. If you decide that it's not for you and you don't want to invest the time, then at least you know.
      I so appreciate you taking the time to comment and to follow along.

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